Change the ‘Me’ to ‘We’ 

“Life is about perspective and how you look at something…ultimately, you have to zoom out.”

Bumble CEO Whitney Wolf Heard

When we shift our focus from ourselves to others, our lives become richer. We begin to see that we are not the center of the universe, and that we need each other. We open our hearts and our arms, and we allow love to fill us up. In doing so, our lives become more fulfilling and meaningful.

I’d like to share a little sample from my new book, in this chapter I look deeper into this important life lesson.

In the summer of 2017, my daughter Enrica spent a week at a WE Take Action Camp. When I went to pick her up at the end of the session, she cried at the prospect of leaving. She said it was the best camp ever because she could be herself and share her ideas without the fear of being shut down. The camp stood true to providing positive change and boosting confidence that is key to this young girl’s mental health. 

At the camp, the girls were in a positive, safe space, where they could lean into their whole selves and personally benefit from changing their focus from ‘me’ to ‘we.’ They left the camp sincerely wanting to make a difference in the world. The environment there exuded the goodness of giving back and being activators of change. Since then, it has been glorious to see Enrica grow into her element and bloom into the lovely young lady she is today. 

This experience was particularly fulfilling when I see so many young people who become disinterested in any effort to give to others if their own agenda is not being served. Entitled kids feel they deserve a free ride at home and elsewhere. They expect to be rescued from errors large and small and to be exempt from rules as they sit at the center of the universe. They demand “more, more, more,” always wonder “what’s in it for me” then rarely show gratitude.

They also learned that to make a difference in the world, we must first take care of ourselves. That means finding true contentment and gratitude in our daily lives, so our souls are rich even if we have fewer material goods. When we are in a state of well-being, giving back to the family, the community, the world, brings unmeasurable personal benefits. The profits are boundless. In other words, build the foundation first, then take on the extra responsibility.

Many of us spend our lives focused on getting an education and amassing nice homes filled with nice things. Somehow, it can still feel pretty empty.

Instead, if we change our perspective to giving, rather than receiving, those same lives become enriched. How does that happen?

As a wise shuttle driver once told me, “Nobody is the center of the universe. We’re social animals, we human beings. We need each other. You gotta open your heart and open your arms and not be afraid, because love is what it’s all about.”

In his words, you change the focus from ‘me’ to ‘we.’ I’ve seen the transformation of that outlook in my own family.

Thank you for reading this little taste of my new book. If you’re interested in reading more, I would be honored if you would sign up for my mailing list.

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